steelmyself | who stole your heart and the key?

Entry tags:

a forest dark,
ic

who stole your heart and the key?

In the dark, you taste something sweet and tart on your tongue, almost like apple but not quite: pomegranate juice, out of nowhere. A hint of something metallic accompanies it.

You fall down.

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Then it seems that I may be in need of a greater fire than I had anticipated.

[She goes quiet for a while, then looks at the doll, gaze falling squarely on one of its arms -

Oh.

Then she looks at the sword in her own hand. Right. This would probably work - so now she needs lumber. More importantly, she needs nails to hold it together. Next step is feeling around for anything that might be nailed down.]

If your own falsehoods are causing you to suffer, then there's no reason for them to exist. I understand now that it's impossible for you to be rid of them through your own effort - it's dreadfully improper of me to hold you to such expectations. You're a human.

But, Haku, I'm not you.

The puppet freezes in place as if hypnotized. It speaks after a long moment, its voice a little more human now.

"No. You're not."

I'm not! So it's possible for me to do this for you.

[A beat.]

Although I'm not very well-versed in construction...

"Destroying it is impossible. I've tried. I've tried to destroy everything about myself and failed."

[... Squinting a little...]

I'm not you.

"That's true, but..." He trails off, a hint of doubt in his voice. "Will you destroy me, then?"

Of course not. I'll take you with me, if you'd like to go - however, we must do away with this house.

The puppet shakes its head. "This house is me. The very heart of my self. If you destroy it, everything comes down."

It pauses.

"You're welcome to try."

...

[There's a good, long pause. It's not really an issue of whether or not she has the right to do that - if she did do it, what would happen to him? That's too big a change. It's a little hard for her to put her finger on the details, but it leaves a bad taste in her mouth.]

If you're certain that would be the result, then I'm afraid that I must refrain. I don't believe that I could allow that to happen.

The puppet's stiff wooden shoulders seem to slump a little. "Very well, then."

I'm -

[Why can't she do it? It's not like it'd be hard to set this place on fire. He'd be happier for it. If he's her friend, if he's really her friend - then she should be able to do that much (on the other hand, considering the last time she tried to make a friend happy she got herself killed - ).

But if it's like this, maybe that's not what he needs anyway. Maybe she has the wrong idea about him. This puppet isn't that bad a representation - this man's not a human at all.

She sighs.]

If you'd like to die, then please come and find me elsewhere. I'm certain that I could kill you until you feel satisfied.

[Even if it didn't work out last time. Last time she'd known him for like an hour. Things are a little better now.]

But in exchange, there's one question that I'd like to ask. Why are you so eager to see this place destroyed?

"Haven't I said enough?" Its voice is toneless once more. "It's a false, fake thing that shouldn't exist...it distorts the world by existing. I do."

And so it's reasonable that you suffer - because your existence is a blight? Is that correct?

"It's more complicated than that. But yes. That's the heart of the matter."

Then be a blight. If you plan to suffer - if you're unable to end your suffering, Haku, then it's best that you play your role wholeheartedly.

[It's not like they can do anything else.]

"Those are my thoughts exactly." But his voice is more hollow than before.

Then it seems that I was mistaken. There's no need for you to be rid of this place.

[Reaches out to pat it on its... head. It's kind of a head.]

But it would be best if it were to become a more proper living space. What could I do?

It hesitates.

"You could eat a meal here. That's how mere buildings become proper living spaces, after all."

... I see.

[Makes sense. The house felt different after she stopped eating dinner alone.]

Where is the dining room?

The puppet hesitates a moment. Then it turns to lead the way. "Over here."

It's Japanese style, with the table low to the floor, and everything is covered in dust just like the rest of the house. But when the puppet awkwardly lowers itself to dust off the table, this time the dust actually seems to disappear as it works.

[There's a good few moments she spends just staring at the table - she's never seen one like this in real life. But after she susses out exactly how to sit at it she settles into a spot, gazing over at the puppet expectantly.]

"I can make something to eat." The puppet sounds almost surprised to confess this, but all the same, it turns towards the kitchen.

[Calling from the room - ]

Please make something delicious! I'm looking forward to it.

After a while, a delicious smell of eggs, rice, and chicken comes from the kitchen, and then the puppet emerges carrying dishes.

"You seemed like you'd prefer a childish meal, so I made omurice."

[SHE IS EIGHTEEN YEARS OLD and not remotely offended because she thinks she's a kid anyway. What does get her, though, is -]

Omelette... rice? Is this breakfast? There's no toast or bacon here.

who stole your heart and the key?

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