steelmyself: (kris taming sari.)
dead Emiya, do not eat ([personal profile] steelmyself) wrote2015-08-09 12:56 pm

application: [community profile] kingdomdaze.


Name: Archer
Age: 30ish, plus a timeless eternity of suffering in the afterlife.
Canon/AU/PG/Original: Fate stay night, Unlimited Blade Works, Bad Ending 22.

Personality/Background: Welcome to Heroic Spirit Emiya Fuck-Up Hour!! Here is a shortened list of all the things wrong with Archer.

♦ From a very young age, he had no sense of self due to trauma and could not figure out how to form one.
♦ So he stuck his adopted father's ideals of being a superhero who saves everyone in the void inside his heart and hoped it would suffice.
♦ IT TOTALLY DIDN'T HOLY SHIT IT DIDN'T AT ALL because being a superhero who saves everyone is IMPOSSIBLE so making your very sense of self depend on it is a SHITTY IDEA.
♦ Having been confronted by the impossibility of his ideals in a hellish afterlife where he endlessly "saves everyone" by killing people who might endanger the human race, Archer has totally broken down into a huge psychological trainwreck of self-loathing and despair.
♦ He is profoundly gripped by the conviction that he is a horrible "fake" who does not deserve to exist and everything will be better if he just TIME PARADOXES HIMSELF OUT OF EXISTENCE THIS IS A GREAT PLAN.
♦ Honestly he really just needs someone to prove to him that it's okay for him to exist even if his ideals are imperfect and his sense of self is a mangled mess. But that won't be easy because he is really dead set on hating himself furiously and forever and also anything that reminds himself of himself EMIYA HAET EMIYA SO MUCH.
♦ "Sense of self" issues aside, ultimately all of this is a result of him having spent a lifetime fighting and killing for the sake of a terrible impossible ideal when he would have been much happier being a househusband!
♦ You heard me. His true destiny should have been to cook and clean for his loved ones. But he missed that boat and became a gritty badass mercenary instead. Oops.
♦ He keeps all of this crap pent up beneath a mask of cool sarcasm and badassery and ruthless cynicism.
♦ You kind of just have to scratch the surface to see that he's actually a big sad loser who just wants to believe in something again, though.

Archer comes from a standard urban fantasy world of hidden magic and vaguely grimdark angst. Once upon a time, he was a traumatized kid rescued from certain death, then adopted, by a man who turned out to be pretty messed-up himself. He spent his life emulating his messed-up father, pursuing his dream of being a superhero who saves everyone--pretty much giving up everything else in life and literally selling his soul to the world in the process. He died young as a result and in the afterlife was forced to confront how impossible the dream he spent his life chasing was, at which point he totally broke down emotionally. The only thing that gave him any consolation was the prospect that he might be able to use some ridiculous time-travel magic to wipe himself out of existence. Eventually, he got that chance when he was summoned as a familiar into a magical war in which his own younger self was participating. But things didn't go as planned, and thanks to said younger self's mistakes, he wound up sacrificing himself in a futile attempt to protect people from an overpowered enemy. When the queen gave him a chance to fix all of that by coming here, he took it.

Sample: Here. (Not commentspam, but all my commentspam with Archer is in Court lately and therefore locked.)


What possessions are they bringing along? His outfit (red cloak and mantle, body armor) is about it; he has powers that allow him to temporarily create his own weapons and some other objects.

What do they want in return for helping? The chance to personally remove himself from existence before things go wrong again.